OWLD PHARTZ ON TOUR – Episode 2

Episode 2 – Busman’s Holiday – checking out Wellington ER Facilities!

Had a wonderful trip down – other than the slight mishap in Melbourne – and David Boone’s record for tinny consumption between England and Australia remains intact! There is of course the return journey to concentrate on and, perhaps with a couple of weeks intensive training I can do better!

The digs are excellent – the only downside is that they are slap bang among the main shopping areas, close to the harbour – methinks I will do very well to get her past the shops to the watering holes around the harbour!

Christmas Eve morning began well, the weather was absolutely lovely – other than a bit windy – but apparently that is to be expected in Wellington! I went out for papers etc in the morning and when I came back I found Maureen collapsed on the floor! The old nursing skills, that many thought were well consigned to history, came to the fore and, while summonsing medical assistance did all the usual stuff around ABC!

After a ride in a nice, shiny ambulance and some excellent attention at the equivalent of the A&E [puts local services to shame] it turns out she was very de-hydrated, a combination of the hang-over from a pre-tour viral infection, jet-lag and not drinking enough on the flight [something that I could NEVER be accused of!]. She was expertly re-hydrated with 2 litres of saline, some judicious dosing with anti-emetics and coupled with various testings and samplings – found to be as fit as 10 men. All she needed was a day or so of rest for normal service to resume.

Previous plans made for Christmas Day therefore went out of the window. We were very fortunate that there was an Arkwright’s store on the corner run by some wonderful folk from the Indian sub-continent and Christmas dinner was prepared with the help of microwaved “ping” dinners, microwaved Apple Danish pastries and ice cream with a bottle of something drinkable [pop for the invalid] a box of Quality Street and a series of stereotypical Christmas movies on TV. How many thousands of miles did we travel for that?

The health scare was quickly over – followed by something much more scary! She was like General Patton planning a military campaign when talking about her plans to “hit the sales”. Suggestions that she “ease herself in gently over the next couple of weeks or so” were pointless – so it looks as though Graham and I will be nothing more than sherpas and escorts on the next stage of community rehab!

More of the travails of the Wellington Retail Experience in later episodes – unless something more interesting happens!

We have had a couple of reccies around Wellington with our own personal tour guide – the webmaster has acquired an expert knowledge of the locale – as well as a groovy hat!

We’ve been to the Te Papa [National Museum] and the Botanical Gardens – very different experiences but both say something about the NZ attitude to life!

The weather has been very good and not nearly as windy as it is supposed to be.

After meandering around what seemed like endless shops and cafés [Wellington is apparently proud of the fact that is has more coffee-shops per person than New York; which shatters the macho sheep-wielding, beer drinking, hard living image of the All Blacks!] I first saw it out of the corner of my eye – talk about peripheral vision! An oasis in an otherwise retail-desert! A genuine Orish Bar – the Black Harp! I feel much happier at the thought of being used as a mobile wallet knowing that sustenance is never more that a block or so away. What makes it even more ironic is that it is close to a shop selling All Black memorabilia – the shop has a big sign saying “World Champion All Blacks” – I’ll have to get a photo of that! I also had to playfully rib the barman in the Black Harp as we were watching the Black Caps take and beat on the might of Bangladesh at cricket. At least by comfortably defeating Bangladesh, I said, New Zealand has at last a winning team in 2007 – what with the World Cup and all that!

Graham had pre-warned us about the expectations around the World Cup and the devastation at going out of the competition so early. The silver lining brigade must have been working overtime to draw this positive, taken from the Dominion Post sports pages on 28th December, when reviewing 2007.

“Jake White overcomes years of political interference to guide South Africa to Rugby World Cup glory. New Zealand finishes a gallant fifth equal!”

The webmaster is doing very well, loving every minute of life in NZ – so much so that we have been openly talking about the prospect of him staying here for longer than a year…… Come to think of it, that discussion might have precipitated the collapse rather than de-hydration! His plans for the next 12 months are beginning to be firmed up – I’ll leave it to him to tell you all about that as it happens.

We are about to head off to the South Island for a few days, to Kaikoura a place the tourist guide describes as “It’s all about encounters with sea creatures here – from whale-watching to dolphin swimming to crayfish devouring!” No unkind remarks about my uncanny resemblance to an albino, pot-bellied whale please!

Until the next episode………..